Am I Masturbating Too Much?

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As a sex educator at Lioness, one of my favorite questions to answer is “is this normal?” While it’s true asking this question can invoke feelings of shame and anxiety, at its core, it’s really an act of rebellion. Simply asking if something is normal is the first step to empowering ourselves and normalizing having healthy and fulfilling sex lives.

 So in the true spirit of destigmatizing sexual health and wellness, let’s answer the question “how much is too much masturbation?”

It’s Possible to Masturbate Too Much

As awesome as it would be to say that it is definitively impossible to masturbate too much, there are some instances where masturbating may be problematic. And we’re going to get into that in a minute.

Before we get into those very specific instances, however, it’s important to consider why you might be worried that you’re masturbating too much. Perhaps it’s driven by a lack of education, shame about masturbation in general, or a partner who doesn’t have the same habits. Or maybe you’ve heard words like “excessive masturbation” or “masturbation addiction” and worry that you might not be “normal.”

No matter what your reason for wondering, there is good news: excessive masturbation and masturbation addiction are, in a word, bullshit.

Sometimes these words are just extensions of “The Powers that Be” making it harder and harder to normalize self-pleasure. Excessive masturbation is the idea that someone can masturbate too much, and masturbation addiction is a bastardization of the idea of compulsive masturbation (again, more on that later).

Just remember that if you’re feeling any type of shame and wondering if you’re masturbating too much, these terms are harmful and won’t help you in the long run.

Using words like “masturbation frequency” or “masturbation habits” is a good first step in finding an answer to whether you are masturbating too much.

So How Much is Too Much Masturbation?

Chances are you’re not masturbating too much, but there are a few exceptions. Whether you’re masturbating daily or more, you may just be a frequent masturbator with a high libido.

How often you masturbate is going to be personal to you. It is completely normal for folks to masturbate a couple times a day, a couple times a week, on weekends only, or never at all! Masturbation is called solo-sex because it’s between you and you only (unless you decide to give mutual masturbation a try!).

person thinking in bed
Photo by RODNAE Productions from Pexels

That said, being aware of the very few instances where masturbation may be problematic is a great way to limit how much shame you might feel based on your own habits.

If you’re ever worried whether you’re masturbating too much, ask yourself the following questions:

  1. Is masturbating interfering with my ability to work, take care of myself, or otherwise carry on with my day-to-day life as normal?
  2. Am I masturbating in inappropriate places and risking violating the consent of other people?
  3. Am I masturbating compulsively, hurting myself, or feeling like I cannot stop even though I want to?
  4. Am I ashamed of my masturbation habits and does that shame come from something in my values systems that I can address?

If you answered yes to numbers 1, 2 or 3, you might want to consider talking to someone you trust about what’s going on, whether that’s a therapist or doctor you have access to, a sexual health hotline (like the one at Planned Parenthood), or just a trusted partner or friend. Masturbation should be pleasurable, not compulsive, painful, or disruptive.

Learn More About Lioness Smart Vibrator

If you answered yes to number 4 and no to the others, however, it may be more helpful to seek resources that offer educating and insight into sexual health. It’s very normal to feel shame when your sexual habits don’t align with what your values have taught you and learning what’s “normal” can help lessen that shame.

The Limit Does Not Exist

In case it hasn’t been said enough, frequent masturbation is normal. The only times you should truly ask yourself if you’re masturbating too much is if it’s interfering with your ability to do things like eat, work, or sleep, or causing you mental and/or physical pain.

In the end, what works best for you is what’s best for you. Trust yourself on that!

What goes well with a great lube? The Lioness Vibrator of course!


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